Fuh.

The presentation thingie went well. Or at least people I work with are telling me it went well to make me feel better and won't actually sack up and say "You made no sense, you were rambling and incoherent and the pathetic bits of humor were really quite pathetic bits of humor."

Ahem.

No paranoia or performance anxiety or anything. Not. At. All.

In other news, I find myself, for various reasons, thinking about people from the past. Last night a friend from high school contacted me after years and years and years and it was...kind of weird. Which got me thinking about the ridiculously intense friendships I seem to fall into. Or at least used to fall into. And not in a borderline-y way. But in that way of girls/women/females/ladies who find that friend who seems to get you and it feels like a friendship that will last forever and all the secrets are splayed out and whenever anything happens, the other person has to hear about rightnow. And she/they is/are that important person you run to first, regardless of whatever boy is around just then.

I don't know. Is it maturity that's helped me form more balanced, healthier friendships that actually last? (Aww...Bum...are you squirming in discomfort now?) In some ways, I like these friendships better. They make more sense. They have nothing to do with my depth of caring about the person. But it's no longer twined all up, kind of destined to flame out.

But still.

Thinking about one friend in particular which flamed out spectacularly, I will never regret the memory I have of us, at sixteen, my brand new license in hand, driving her mother's Trans Am on a dark and rainy night on winding backroads, feeling so very grown up, and really just two little girls, so excited to be actually driving ourselves.

We were just much too cool.